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Revengecast S03E07 - Resurgence

http://daveandjoel.com/?p=7441

Don’t mean’t to scare you, Ems, but there’s a new sheriff in town and her name is BIZZY PRESTON.

I guess? Or like maybe it’s spelled Bissy…?

Either way, IT’S REVENGECAST #NONOTESEDITION!!!!

You couldn’t paint a prettier picture of the Hamptons in mid-summer. July 4th is just around the corner and what do rich people enjoy celebrating more than things were going swimmingly (like literally, because they were in the ocean (okay but technically i guess they were on a raft)) until that Bismuth B Preston, PR Flack To The Stars, showed up on their doorstep with a publicity plan, a suitcase, and a dream (and a large advance on a colossal invoice). Now it’s like all we talk about is “reputation,” and “how to reform the Grayson name,” and “you kids wouldn’t lie to me behind my back about having emotional affairs with poor ex-girlfriends whose chance at a peaceful, productive life was shattered directly by you (much like their spine) over one fateful night and a fifth of Banker’s Club,” right?

Right?

You know what they say. You can’t spell “business” without “bizzy,” and the Graysons paid for the only Bizzy in town and if that doesn’t also round up to the best Bizzy in town then I’ll eat my hat!

Only problem is (aside from the part where Bizzy seems supremely bad at her job): a certain Buzzard Prusten has history with a certain Archibald J. Nolan “Nolz” Nolan The Third. And by “history” I mean a “traumatic and public tabloid outing that rent wide the rift between him and his homophobic father once and for all (just when I was about to bridge it with money, Ems; just when I was about to buy my poor father’s love back with all my new money. ;_; ;_; ;_; ;_; ;_; ;_; ;_; ;_;)

Here’s what’s really real: I just don’t buy Nolan pining for an abusive father that abandoned him except for the fact that Nolan is so incredibly lonely. So, in that sense, the pieces do really fit. In a different sense, once you create a sex dolphin robot and imbue it with a human soul created through mad alchemy–like, quite frankly…

Hey, I dunno. Maybe that’s fine. Maybe that’s normal. I can’t presume to say. It’s reasonable to say that NolzOne, locked up in the Basement’s Basement, and being a real pill about it, isn’t holding up his end of the bargain. Emily certainly isn’t!! All she cares about is Revenge! And, like, it’s one of those things where your friend gets really really into something and you’re kinda like “it’s cool I guess…”but she’s like it’s not “””coool””” it’s called Revenge and um actually??? It’s super great? So get on my level, put on the Google Glass, and start Revenging before I officially dissolve this friendship just like your dad did.

In this episode of Revengecast, aside from Bizzy Bs and their propensity for “readers,” I’m not sure of a whole heck of a lot of merit actually happened. Like I guess it’s fair to say that Victoria maybe spent a little too much time Pouncing on Peas to really get any substantive Burn Work done; then again, in that sense we used to say about games like Gigawing, “it’s the slow bullet that kills,” and I haven’t seen a slower bullet than Sarah J. Cupcakes in about an age. I guess it’s fair to say that Aiden was excommunicated from the Hamptons (again (again again?)) I guess, you might think, it’s also fair to say that a Macaron is not a Macaroon (though it is, perhaps, a “Jackaroon”), but we’ve all been down that rabbit hole before (and somehow that, plus all his other nebulously terrible characteristics) didn’t prevent Jack Porter from getting laid by the Total Wash Of Charisma that is Magaux Lemarchal, whose casually tousled hair is, and will remain for some time, a thing to behold.

AAAH. WE FORGOT TO MENTION HOW VICTORIA SENDS AIDEN OFF WITH A INDEPENDENCE DAY BURN. THAT’S WHAT WE DID. THAT’S WHAT WE FORGOT FORGOT.

Topics for Consideration:

STICKY PISTOL
Grayson Family Compote
Do Bleckards Dream Of Electronic Sheep
What Happened To Nemo??
Mme. Bex Delacroix-Taylor-Kreuz
The Hunger Games but Kanzaki Nao

Comments

  • So like about that Yakuza bit, yeaaaaaaaaaah, gravure idols are a weird thing, to say the least, that still totally exist today.

    Also, I damn near screamed at work when you two started talking about the Mandela Effect. I found out about it about a month ago and it makes me actually angry every time I hear about it. The way I described that anger to a friend is like...at least most conspiracy theories seem to craft some kind of intricate (but ultimately very stupid) plot out of their bullshit; Mandela Effect is literally just "I don't wanna admit that human memory is inherently flawed and that brand recognition and pop culture references are a fucking pox on society."
  • HAVE YOU GUYS heard about the television adaptation of 1973's Time After Time? That's not the crazy part. Just LOOK who's playing Jack the Ripper

    https://youtube.com/watch?v=VN4C4Ar5BLo
  • WATTTTTTTTTTT
  • they should call him the peeler
  • Love is like the ocean. It's big, sloppy, wet, and sometimes there's crabs.

    ******

    I haven't listened to all of it yet but I'm surprised that you didn't pick up on the numerology of August 8 = 8-8 = double-infinity,

    Or maybe it's double-zero-eight, like, the end of infinity, zero out the eights...?
  • Although "88" is also a nazi prison tat, so I dunno ("H" is the 8th letter of the alphabet so "88" = "HH" = "Heil Hitler")
  • That is a really good catch that I'd just save to give you credit on the podcast, but we already recorded the next episode and I don't want to forget.

    And also a terrible coincidence :<
  • edited March 9
    They can still legally require you to put in your passcode.

    The reason people say to go with a passcode instead of thumbprint is that with a passcode, you can do it wrong on purpose four times to brick the phone, then say "whoops forgot my password lol guess I was nervous!"
  • edited March 14
    This is what I was talking about: https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2016/05/iphone-fingerprint-search-warrant/480861/
    The Fifth Amendment, which protects people from incriminating themselves during legal proceedings, prevents the government from compelling someone to turn over a memorized PIN or passcode. But fingerprints, like other biometric indicators—DNA, handwriting samples, your likeness—have long been considered fair game, because they don’t reveal anything in your mind. (Marcia Hofmann, a digital-rights lawyer, wrote a comprehensive rundown of the question in late 2013, when it was still hypothetical.)
  • Well, there's what's LEGAL for them to do, and then there's the guy standing at the counter saying "either you can input your passcode and let me look at your phone, or you can turn your smug ass around and get back on the damn plane".

    Not that the latter will be improved by intentionally bricking your phone but at least you can say "I screwed this up, now I couldn't show you what's on my phone even if I wanted to".
  • I accidently skipped this one, whoops. You fucked up, Dave. You could've picked anyone, but you decided to pick Gillian Anderson. Graz was right, she was one of the best actors in Princess Mononoke. It's easy to talk shit about her since she happens to be a screen actor, but it turns out she's a pretty good voice actor too!
  • edited March 17
    I don't mean to pick on GA. She just had the misfortune of being the only name I could remember from that movie when it came time for the bit.

    I also don't even remember why we were talking about it/what my greater point was. :open_mouth:
  • You were complaining about Dishonored 2. I forgot why Princess Mononoke came under the crossfire. San was the one voice I would pick out as NG, but frankly she was barely in it.
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